"Mom, I —" Ryan wanted to retort that but couldn't bring himself to. He was confident until he hadn't t Arwen, but after eting her, he felt his confidence wavering.
The way Arwen had treated him told him the tale that he had been denying all this while. It truly looked like she no longer cared for him. Like he didn't affect her anymore.
She truly looked like she had moved one. But how can it be so easy for her to move on?
"What?" When Beca didn't hear her son responding, she asked. "You think you have the ability? Or is it you have co to realize that you didn't."
Ryan stared at her and the answer was clear in his eyes. Yet, he chose to reason. "Mom, but her choice is wrong her decision is wrong. Maybe I have ssed up a big one this ti, and I no longer hold the ability to bring her back into my life. But … But the one she chose over … do you think he is suitable? Do you think he deserves her? He is an —"
"He is her choice, Ryan," Beca stressed, her tone rising with a gentle but deliberate curve. "He is the one she chose for herself. And that alone makes him more able than you. Arwen's choice is Arwen's decision, son. Neither you, nor , nor anyone else hold the right to question if that man deserves her or not. It's for Arwen to decide and I am sure, she has made her decision —all loud and clear."
Ryan shook his head, trying hard to deny those words. But this ti, he could bring himself to strongly deny them.
Beca stared at her son, helpless. She didn't want to dean him, but she knew this was the only way to make him see the reality that he had been desperately ignoring.
"Ryan, you are my son and I want the best for you. But you don't deserve every best in this world and Arwen is one of that. You don't deserve her anymore. So, you should now finally let her go," she said and Ryan shook his head again.
"No, I don't want to."
Beca placed her hand on his shoulder and said again, "You missed your chance, Ryan. Now being reluctant serves no purpose. When you had ti, you didn't cherish her enough, and now even if you go down on your knees, it wouldn't help. So, be wise, and let her go."
Ryan still shook his head, denying that. Beca didn't co here to persuade him, but after seeing the realization of the reality in his gaze earlier, she thought maybe she would be able to help. But now, seeing that he still looked so reluctant, there seed no choice for her.
Staring at her son for a mont longer, she took in a deep breath and slowly sighed. "If you are still unwilling to see the reality when it is so evident and clear, I don't think saying more will serve any purpose. In that case, I won't persuade you anymore."
She paused for a brief mont and then added, "Though you are my son and guiding you to the right path is both my duty and responsibility. You are no longer a child. You are old enough to make your own decisions. And I won't intervene in them. So, decide for yourself."
She then pressed the heels of her hand on the sofa, ready to get up to leave. "Today, I just ca back to see you. You haven't co ho and both your dad and I miss you a lot. So, if you get ti, co ho for dinner. We would love to see you back."
With that, she stood up to leave. But the mont, she took her first step, her arms were held back. She stopped in her steps and turned to look back at her son who was now staring up at her with tearful eyes.
Those teary eyes at first took her aback, given how after the age of five she saw him cry. But today, seeing him crying lted her heart, once again.
"Mom, I don't want to let her go. Can you please tell what can i do to have her back in my life? To overturn everything that had happened?" he asked, his voice coming out helpless, barely above the whisper. But given the serenity in the air, Beca could hear him all well.
His every word pierced her heart, making it hard for her to bear. She had envisioned her son regretting it, but she never thought it would be to this extent.
"Ryan, son, get up. You —"
Ryan shook his head and cried. "I can't let her go, Mom. I simply can. Just the thought of her leaving pains so much. It's unbearable. I can't take this pain, Mom. Help , please. I will do anything and everything you tell to. But just get her back to ."
Seeing him like that, Beca didn't have the heart to refuse. But even if she didn't want to refuse her son, there was nothing she could do. She couldn't possibly force Arwen to co back, could she?
Shaking her head, she was about to speak when Ryan hugged her legs and hid his face. "I can't bear to see her go, leaving alone. I simply can't," he cried. "Can you please ask her to look at again? If not with love, then at least with so familiarity."
Beca felt her heart getting heart at his cry. His tears were making her weak. But even so, she felt equally helpless.
Her hand went to his hair, caressing it to soothe him. But knowing well about her son's pains, she knew no dicine, no caress could make him feel better.
"Mom, her indifferent gaze hurts a lot. It makes feel as if I lost the world and am now left with nothing," he sobbed. "Her estranged attitude makes feel guilty. But even though I feel like that, I find no way to repent for my mistakes. And that's making feel horrible. Please help , Mom. Please."
Beca closed her eyes, not knowing what to say. She felt helpless. Which mother would feel like that seeing her grown-up kid crying like that?
"How do you want to help you, Ryan?" she asked. "After what you did to Arwen, even if I beg her, it wouldn't suffice. You didn't just humiliate her a few tis here and there; you left her to die when you could have saved her. After that, with what face do you expect to go to her and ask her to give you the chance?"
"And even if I ask, do you think she would agree?" Beca shook her head as if she didn't need to confirm to know that Arwen wouldn't. "She is already married, Ryan. She left her family for that marriage. The girl who didn't dare to talk back at her mother, fearing that it would hurt Catrin's feelings once. Today, the sa girl didn't let Catrin even speak a word against her husband. She left her family, and her ho, just to be with that man —to fulfil her marriage with him. Do you still think anyone now could bring her back?"
Ryan remained silent and Beca understood his silence. Sitting back on the sofa, she let her lips curl up in a sad smile. "Accept the reality already, son," she said, her tone laced with empathy. "I know it must be hurting a lot. But this is the pain you, yourself, registered to. Now that you have signed for this. You can't think of going back. Because at the end of the day, you can't change a thing that had already happened."
"Mom, I know, but —"
"But you still want to persist?"
"Mom, please …" Ryan didn't know what he was begging for. "I accept it all and I won't insist anymore. But Mom, I truly can't stay like this … without her. At least, help ask her to not be indifferent towards . Help ask her to not treat like a stranger, she never ca across. I can't bear that."
He said and Beca stared at him for a mont, as if considering his words. She was her son, and even if she knew he was wrong, she couldn't bear to see her like that.
Thinking about it for a while, she closed her eyes and then nodded. "Fine," she said. "I will help you ask her out. But Ryan, that's all I can do. I can help you get a chance, but it will be up to Arwen whether she wants to accept you back in her life or not. Neither you nor I can force her into anything which she doesn't agree about."
"Mom, I understand," he said, contented. "I won't force her into anything. I just want to be there in her life. Even as a part that's hardly visible to her."
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