’They really are omnipotent monsters!’ Lee thought to himself, and squatted next to the stream to have a mouthful of fresh water. As expected, the Overlord of Whispers heard the tease after he returned to Freeheaven city, and it was scary to think what other abilities overlords were capable of developing.
On the other hand, Lee kind of felt bad for Seris. The harmless old lady effortlessly picked up a weakly uttered sentence hundreds of miles away, and it ant that it was as the legend said – she was capable of hearing everything in the world. No wonder she tried to hide away in the middle of nowhere! Her head was probably exploding from all the information that constantly flooded in.
"Don’t you play gas with , boy!" Seris’s shout made Lee turn his head towards the wooden shack, but even if she looked angry, it was not enough to fool him.
"I missed you too!" Lee smiled back at her, "I won’t keep you in suspense. So, a son goes to his father, and asks – dad, what’s the difference between theory and practice? Father thinks for a mont, and says – go ask your sister and mother whether they would sleep with an overlord for a pile of gold."
"Oh?" Old madam’s expression imdiately changed, and she sat next to Lee, just like she had done during the days when he visited her the last ti.
Back then she tornted him, forcing Lee to tell all the jokes he knew. The problem was – he quickly ran out, but since she was not in a hurry, she settled down next to him and patiently waited until he rembered another one.
Lee didn’t waste the ti in Skalara. Obviously, he fully focused on fighting when it was necessary, or recovering when he was injured. But while the army of hunters was traveling, he thodically registered every joke and anecdote he heard.
Spending three months around sweaty and bored n, well, and a few won, allowed him to accumulate enough material that could last him for two or three days around Seris. It wasn’t much, but it was impossible to fully satisfy the old lady in the first place, so this had to be enough.
The one Lee opened with was chosen for a reason, though. During the escape from Panello, he had an unexpected revelation, and now needed overlord’s advice.
"So, the boy goes to his older sister, and asks if she would sleep with an overlord for a pile of gold." Lee said, "The sister looked back at him as if he was a retard, and said – it’s an overlord, idiot! The peak of existence, a god! I’d do anything he asked for free, let alone a pile of gold!"
"Makes sense." The old madam said with a nod.
Lee ignored her, and continued, "Then the boy went to his mother and asked the sa. Mother was taken aback by the unexpected question, and said – overlords are really old, right? Well ... but for a pile of gold ... sure. Boy went back to his father, but on the way t his grandfather, and just for fun asked him the sa."
"I don’t like where this is going." Seris said.
"Grandfather didn’t either." Lee said, "But after giving it a thought, he said – no matter how powerful a dude is, it’s still a dude, but a pile of gold is a pile of gold, so ... sure. The boy rushed back to his father and retold what he heard from his family mbers."
"And?" Seris asked.
Lee looked at her, and said with a grin, "The father said – you see, son! In theory we are rich, but in practice we live with two whores an old gay."
Lee could see the old madam’s eyes lit up, but she didn’t giggle or laugh out loud.
She pondered for a mont, and said, "Six ... no, seven out of ten."
"Really?" Lee was surprised, "When I heard it during my first life I thought it was a nine at least!"
To better understand the overlord’s preferences, last ti he ca up with an idea for her to grade his jokes at the scale from one to ten. At first Seris didn’t like the it, but quickly changed her mind after she realized it allowed her to elegantly critique Lee’s performance. Lee, of course, soon regretted own suggestion, but it was already too late – instead of laughing or giggling, the old madam began to act like an annoying school teacher.
"I would’ve given it an eight if you didn’t tell it with a purpose." She said, closely looking back at Lee. Seeing the young man’s expression suddenly change amused her more than the previous joke.
"You picked up on that, huh?" Lee said, realizing it was probably impossible to manipulate an experienced monster like her, "I ca across a couple of Old Gods in Skalara. Huge creatures, enormous. Anyway, you were right, they were capable of using multiple elents, three at least. And one of them, the Scorpion King, used two at the sa ti – first earth and wind, and afterwards fire and wind."
"Really? Earth and wind at the sa ti? Interesting." Seris said, turning serious.
"I was also baffled. Elents with opposing characteristics, right?" Lee said, "I got in a bit of a pickle before the return ..."
"So I heard." Seris said, "Told a bad joke to soone?"
"You can put it that way." Lee said, "Anyway. When escaping, I pushed myself to the limit, but I still wasn’t fast enough. But then I rembered the Scorpion King who used both wind and fire at the sa ti to empower its charge. I tried to imitate the Old God, except my body almost exploded from the overload. I basically ca up with a suicidal move, although, it did save my life."
"... and now you want to know why in theory it worked for the Scorpion King, but in practice you almost died?" Seris voiced Lee’s question, "Tell more about the Old Gods."
Lee thought for a bit, and choosing the relevant information, said, "They used more than one elent, but had only one spark – white, in both cases. And that’s not the interesting part! The sparks, even after properly stored, pretty quickly transford. One into an earth spark, and the other – fire. The only thing that remained the sa was their shape. They were round as a ball."
Seeing Seris was not going to imdiately answer, Lee continued, "The obvious explanation is that the damned Old Gods had ignited their sparks naturally. Then, with ti, consuming countless creatures and hibernating next to Dragon Veins, they accumulated other elents, storing their particles in the sa spark – hence the visual and physical transformation into a white ball. Upon their death, the non-original elent’s dissipate at extre rate, and the spark recover it’s color."
Lee paused, gathered his thoughts, and said, "It all makes sense. White is the combination of all the colors in the world, and sphere is the perfect form. The problem is – it’s in theory I also have several elents, but in practice, when I use two at the sa ti, I almost explode. And that’s ignoring the agony I feel no matter what elent I use! What the fuck I’m supposed to do? I don’t have one spark – I’ve got four! And none of them are my own!"
He got slightly worked up, but after venting his pain, took a deep breath and cald down. Seris didn’t say anything, but held her chin and emptily stared in the distance. They sat there for the rest of the day in silence, but at the sunset she went back into her hut.
Left with nothing to do, Lee closed his eyes and focused on his Dantian, observing the sparks and elental particles rotating around them.
The overlord was absent for several days. Lee patiently waited, knowing well she would co out as soon as she thought of a solution, and prayed it wouldn’t take a decade to co up with one.
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