The friends I knew... just an illusion?
"You think by suddenly spouting such absurdity... I would believe it?" I asked.
"Oh, has your intuition failed you here? I have already given you the answer, whether it’s absurd, you just need to think a little deeper to understand," the child-like "Changan" smiled and said, "Perhaps from your point of view, the personality ’Zhu Changan’ existed first, and the mory of ’Yinyue’ appeared out of nowhere from his personality one day... But that is the incorrect order of precedence.
"From the very mont Changan was born, my mory existed within him as an instinct and unconscious inheritor of his bloodline. It was actually who appeared first. However, as Changan was still an infant then, he couldn’t bear my entirety, so as a compromise, I could only manifest a part of myself within him, not even knowing who I was, like a blank consciousness.
"It wasn’t until he reached puberty, when secondary sexual characteristics began to develop, that I finally recognized the real , and more inherited mories began to awaken from within the consciousness, and my powers began to subtly appear. The Zhu family called this ’Demon bloodline out of control,’ which is a huge misunderstanding; it was a natural growth that followed logic. Although I was sealed afterward, I did not disappear; I simply went back into hiding within the realm of instinct and the unconscious.
"Since you have studied mysticism, you should understand the relevant psychological knowledge that borders on mysticism. The relationship between the conscious mind and the unconscious is similar to the relationship between the surface of the water and the water itself; the latter is the true main body of consciousness.
"The personality ’Zhu Changan’ is like a shallow dream I had... and once you remove , the main body, there would be no reason for Changan to continue to exist. What would the surface of the water be without the water itself? If you forcefully delete it, what remains will be a blank personality.
"This personality can still continue to grow and can even be nad ’Zhu Changan’ again, but it surely won’t be the Changan you knew."
—What he said was all true.
Although I could question him like a "contrarian," my heart had already given the answer.
"Even if this is true... what about it?" I said steadfastly, "If Changan is just an illusion, I just need to find a way to make him real. Since there are demons like you in this world who can turn illusions into reality, then Changan is not completely without hope of being saved."
Having said that, I realized, to my dismay, that this seemingly extraordinary response was probably expected by him.
"Changan"—Yinyue’s stance is to survive, not to seek death, so the last thing he should do is tell Changan is beyond saving, but instead, he should be trying to tie his own life and death to Changan’s while telling Changan can be saved.
He didn’t tell directly but used a tactic similar to reverse psychology.
"Yes, you’re likely to say that. Because you and Ying Lingyun are similar, both of you are not the types to easily give up on such matters," "Changan" smiled, "My father, my son, my lover... he also liked to cling to those non-existent illusions. How naïvely adorable.
"If I had t you in your childhood, maybe I would have killed your parents covertly, just like killing his parents, then taken you ho as a foster mother before making you fall in love with ."
"Don’t lump together with Ying Lingyun."
As I responded, I thought about ways to break this situation. Regrettably, while killing Yinyue is easy for now, saving Changan is sothing I’m powerless to do. Even becoming Impermanence, my power is ultimately specialized in destruction, not in protection and rescue. Even if I fully understood the capabilities of the Fake Water Moon, I couldn’t use them on Yinyue as the source of power.
But I can first take control of Yinyue, and then plan slowly. Even if I can’t save Changan, there are others who can. Take Fa Zheng, for instance; since he wants to ally with under the banner of Governance Ideology, it’s necessary for him to show corresponding sincerity. He is a very senior Impermanence, and even if he doesn’t possess the specific skills, perhaps he knows soone who does. Letting him find a solution for is one way forward.
Although controlling Yinyue for a long ti is not a simple task, since I was able to capture her before, there’s no reason I can’t do it again should she try to escape. At worst, I could keep burning her spirit with flas, making her unable to awaken for a long ti—suddenly, I had a doubt.
Capturing Yinyue was not only my goal but also the goal of the Water Navy Xuanwu. Even I find it difficult to control Yinyue for a long ti, so what makes the Water Navy Xuanwu think he can do it?
He and Yinyue at her pri were of the sa level, and Yinyue could exert her pri powers around Moon Concealing Mountain. Even though he could destroy Yinyue with a "Golden Core" strike, he doesn’t have the power to capture her alive. Not to ntion, even if he miraculously captured Yinyue, if she just slightly alters history, then all his efforts would be in vain.
"Where can’t you mix things up? In the end, what you all want is just for your own convenience," Changan continued. "Although you have shown an unswerving attitude towards Changan, your friend, do you really care so much about him?
"No, you only care about yourself. After I told you that Changan’s personality was just an illusion I created, you were neither sad nor angry, but quickly cald down, thinking about how to resolve this issue...
"I acknowledge you have great spiritual power, but is this really the behavior of soone deeply attached to their friends? It has always been like this, when you realized that you had truly co into contact with the abnormal world, the first thing you did was decide to cut ties with Changan. In your eyes, adventure is far more important than friends. When you abandon friends for the sake of adventure, you don’t even shed a tear.
"It’s the sa now, if Changan were the princess kidnapped by , the evil dragon, then you, the hero, aren’t coming to slay the dragon to rescue the princess, but to slay the dragon and therefore have to rescue the princess. The friend in danger is secondary, the danger itself is what you really pursue. You just really like the role of ’unwavering loyalty to friends’ and are keen to put yourself into it.
"You have never even considered the possibility of fighting alongside him. Perhaps you think this is all for his safety, but if the roles were reversed and he said the sa to you, would you be able to accept it willingly? Putting sothing you find unacceptable onto a friend, is that the way you respect your friend?
"Changan is my facet, and what I’m telling you now is what my son is thinking. And what I’m about to say is also what he wants to ask you.
"—In your heart, is this friend of mine really that important?"
For so reason, "Changan" seed to want to dig into my inner self, to interrogate my true intentions.
"I admit, Changan—or rather friendship—is not the most important thing in my heart." I said, "So what about it? If friends aren’t placed above everything else, does that an they are no longer friends?
"I am anxious about Changan being pulled into danger and want to rescue him by any ans necessary; at the sa ti, I am excited about being able to join my friend’s peril and want to conquer this danger as a challenger. Is it that only the latter is my true emotion, and the forr is feigned?
"Both are my genuine feelings. Stop confusing with your either/or fallacies, Yinyue. Moreover, what I’m saying now can also be applied to you."
"?" Changan countered.
"I do indeed only think about myself, but even I wouldn’t want to make friends with soone as evil as , while Changan is the good person who is different from . His nature is to think more about others, and that’s why I beca friends with him," I said. "He is definitely not the type of person who would be imrsed in his own sorrow while his friends exhaust every effort to save him.
"Perhaps I really disappointed him, and he is truly saddened by my occasional coldness, but that’s not all there is to his feelings. If Changan himself ca to complain to , it would be another story, but what right do you have to complain to ? To take the simplest evidence, if he gave up on that easily, would you still need to go to such lengths to try killing in the past?
"Stop misinterpreting my friend’s thoughts, my friend is not that weak!"
I made my words resonant, and upon hearing them, "Changan" reflexively said: "—Do you even need to ask?"
He paused for a mont, then shook his head and laughed, "It seems my soul is really not lightly hurt by you, my consciousness is still sowhat unclear, even a dream I had can affect back..."
Yinyue was affected?
This imdiately gave further thoughts.
"With your power, you should be able to separate Changan out, allowing him to continue existing as a personality independent from you," I still set my sights on Yinyue. "As long as you accomplish this and swear never to harm anyone around again, I can spare your life."
"Changan" said without hesitation: "That’s impossible."
"Why? Although Changan is just a dream you created, he still interferes with your spiritual perfection. Wouldn’t it be a good thing for yourself if you could externalize him?" I asked, "Or are you truly insisting on a death wish?"
"If I really did that, I would beco useless to you. More importantly, if it were really possible, I would have already separated him out or just deleted him entirely," he said.
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