Agreeing to Create Bad Games, What the Hell Is ‘Titanfall’? Chapter 302: Konik, When the Hell Are You Coming?! I F*ing

“Hmm...”

The mont XTT entered the main ga interface, he sensed sothing off and muttered thoughtfully.

After closing seven pages like “Daily Tasks,” “First Recharge Rewards,” “Server Launch Events,” “Gathering Gifts,” and “Pride Flag Collection,” the prodigy fell into deep contemplation.

“Damn it...”

XTT hesitated, even doubting if he had entered the right ga:

“Am I launching the $75 pre-ordered Apex Pri? Not the free Fireline Shuttle, right?”

Opening thunder strike!

The chat barrage instantly exploded!

Damn! Mid-month reading already! Everyone’s using the CloudPower motion-sensing pods, so why is the Fireline Shuttle popup still showing up?

“Hahaha, dude, this is perfect! Has CloudPower been possessed by Little Polar Bear?”

“Stop the awkward hate. Fireline Shuttle doesn’t have this many popups anymore, plus they’re giving out the Phoenix Mount for free.”

“Huh? I’ll check it later. First, I want to claim the Phoenix Mount...”

Right from the start, this cracked up. I even thought I saw a lucky draw big wheel just now?

“No, you weren’t hallucinating. There really is a big wheel for weapon draws...”

“Huh?”

This... $75?

Damn! I’ve officially beco a low-level idiot!

It’s hard to imagine this is the interface of a buy-to-play ga. I just can’t hold it together, hahahaha...

...

And this was your design???

Under that opening thunder strike, it wasn’t just the many experienced players.

Even Shen Miaomiao, who doesn’t play much, was shocked by the dazzling, money-sucking popup pages!

This kind of thing... should only exist in free-to-play gas, right? And even then, not all free gas are like this...

After all, she thought she’d only seen this level of popup annoyance in a few XunTeng gas developed by Guangyao Studio.

Even Tianlang’s free gas didn’t have such horrifying pay-to-win popups.

“Oh, that was Old Lu’s suggestion,”

Gu Sheng smiled and nodded:

“Old Lu thought XunTeng’s opening money-sucking popups were too disgusting. Every ti you start the ga, you have to spend half a minute closing popups—it’s infuriating. So, he just added them in here.”

While saying this,

Gu Sheng took a sip of cola, shrugged, and muttered to himself, “They really didn’t change a thing...”

Shen Miaomiao was stunned.

She looked at the livestream window in despair.

CloudPower really is dumb as a rock, but they sure stepped on a landmine.

Is this...

“Deliberately trying to annoy people? Damn it!”

Before Shen Miaomiao could finish her muttering, XTT in the livestream was the first to completely lose it. Looking at the dense red notification dots on tags like [Events], [Pass], [Lucky Wheel], [Legend: Destiny], [Superhero], and [Limited-Ti Packs] after closing pages, he looked like a volcano on the verge of eruption:

“Damn it! Did I just start playing a f***ing PC browser ga here? I paid to buy it outright, didn’t I? Right? I better check my purchase record later—I don’t rember getting a refund. This ga didn’t turn free-to-play right after release, did it?”

As soon as he said this,

The livestream erupted with laughter; the viewers were practically flying with joy.

“I knew it!”

“Hahahahaha, this is too abstract.”

“So is it CloudPower cheating or Little Polar Bear cheating?”

“Man, I’m dying laughing at this page.”

“Witch doctor level fifteen, walking sideways across the whole region!”

“Hello everyone, I’m Zhazha Hui. The never-before-seen miracle new version. Tonight at 8, if you’re a brother, co slash .”

“This page is just f***ing hilarious.”

“The prodigy turned into an idiot overnight! Is this the distortion of humanity or moral decay? Stay tuned tonight at 8 for ‘The Road of the Lost Sufferers.’”

“Damn, this is a livestream god-level mont.”

“No wonder there’s no player feedback—they’re all busy laughing, right?”

“Hahahahahaha, damn...”

...

“Hmm... this was Da Jiang’s idea,”

Gu Sheng saw Little Nezha staring at him dumbfounded again, so he shrugged:

“Da Jiang thought this was even more disgusting than popups, so he added it. Who knew they reused it... probably so dumb foreigner who’s never seen this kind of madness.”

“This is outrageous, brother!”

Shen Miaomiao was at a loss.

In her shock, she suddenly formulated a theory—

The industry’s top players aren’t just at the top because they know the path to success; more importantly, they know exactly where the biggest traps are in the industry.

But the problem is!

Even an outsider like her could see this ultimate, brainless, obviously player-annoying design.

How could the designer in charge at CloudPower not see it?

Logically, even if the project designer was incompetent:

“He shouldn’t be *that* incompetent, right?”

Shen Miaomiao just couldn’t understand.

Hearing this, Gu Sheng smiled knowingly:

“The designer in charge isn’t incompetent at all. He was once one of the ‘Big Three’ at Kora and handled two major Triple-A projects—Silent Hill and Extre Path. He is...”

Fate is strange.

Shen Miaomiao’s expression grew complicated as she silently closed her eyes in despair for CloudPower.

Yamamoto Tsunashiro.

This unlucky guy ended up opposing Old Gu again.

That explained everything.

Without a doubt, the bitter past failures caused Yamamoto Tsunashiro to develop severe ‘Gu Sheng PTSD.’

For Old Gu, this unlucky guy must feel both fear and hatred. After ‘stealing’ the plan personally supervised by Old Gu, he blindly trusted the authority of this now globally renowned supernova designer.

Old Gu digs a pit, and he jumps into it.

In fact,

He probably already saw the big iron nail at the bottom of the pit but, under the pressure of ‘Gu Sheng’s authority,’ fooled himself into thinking it was a chocolate teething stick—and jumped in without hesitation.

Sigh...

Shen Miaomiao sighed helplessly, took a sip of the brown sugar water Old Gu had specially made for her, then slightly leaned sideways, gently resting her head on Gu Sheng’s shoulder, finding a comfortable position.

So be it.

Marry a chicken and follow the chicken, marry a dog and follow the dog. Who made blind back then to pick such a seemingly clever but actually truly smart steward?

Adjust the mindset.

Just watch the show.

After all...

Putting aside the rebates and other external factors,

This ga really is hilariously absurd to an insane degree.

“Ah—damn it, can’t players who can’t play damage (DPS) just not steal kills! What the hell are you even playing?!”

XTT’s voice in the livestream was filled with rage!

Barely tolerating the nauseating opening pages, XTT, like an unlucky guy who just got up after falling, hadn’t even stood steadily before being trucked by the ‘fixed 222’ setup!

Any FPS player has a heart that just wants to do damage.

But under the fixed 2T2N2D lineup, so many DPS players just can’t get matched.

So, a painfully awkward situation occurred—

If you play T (Tank) or N (Support), the match ti is only 5–10 seconds at most, and the ga starts imdiately.

But if you play D (Damage), the displayed match ti is a full two minutes!

And that’s just the displayed ti.

After five minutes of still no ga start, XTT chose the hero “Cross Hamr” and entered the ga.

The team competition in this ga is divided into two main types—

Dog Tag collection and Flag Capture.

Dog tags are simple: kill enemies, pick up dog tags, the team with the most at the end wins.

Theoretically, to win this mode, D kills, T picks up tags, and N heals T.

But XTT’s two DPS players were pure mad dogs!

One couldn’t kill anyone and kept feeding dog tags to the opponents.

“Ah, I’m really... please stop feeding, damn it... just take my hamr!”

Boom—

Seeing the useless teammates, XT, gifted as he was, charged in with the Hamr hero, relying on his health advantage, cornered the opposing player holding the highest number of dog tags.

Then, Hamr’s ultimate combo instantly killed the opponent!

Ding!!!

28 dog tags instantly flashed before XTT’s eyes!

The livestream exploded with cheers!

Even Gu Sheng and Shen Miaomiao raised their arms in cheer, shouting “Aweso!”

But in the next second—

Crash—

A green figure like a ghost suddenly flashed in front of XTT and snatched away his hard-earned 28 dog tags.

At this mont, the match countdown reached the last ten seconds!

“Ah!”

XTT gave a short startled shout, stunned, watching his teammate “Ninja Gen” reach back to grab a long blade!

[Golden Strike Activated—Wow Cool!]

Boom!

[Ah—]

Halfway through the ultimate, Ninja Gen was instantly headshot and killed by the enemy cowboy’s two shots.

Last second!

Ding!

The 28 dog tags were precisely picked up by the enemy cowboy.

[Defeat]

Silence.

A long silence.

XTT was completely silent.

He quietly opened the scoreboard, selected Ninja Gen’s player ID, chose to report, and then selected “Maliciously Disrupting the Ga Environnt.”

The next second,

A popup appeared—

“Sorry, Vanguard did not detect any abnormal data for this player. Please use the ga reporting feature responsibly to help maintain a good ga environnt. Thank you~”

“F*** off!!!”

An explosive roar echoed throughout the livestream, even causing the microphone to crackle!

XTT’s volcano finally erupted!

Like a raging tsunami, like roaring flas!

“F***! Did you hear , f***!”

“My teammate died and fed the enemy! You tell to responsibly use the report function for this kind of ga environnt?”

“I’m reporting you, f*** it, I’m reporting! This f***ing ga!”

“You bastards sold this $75 piece of sh*t! Are you in a rush to buy a coffin, you f***ing piece of crap!”

“Damn your blood, Konik!”

“I’m outta here, f*** you all!!!”

“Ah—!!!”

XTT’s ultimate breakdown and the audience’s uproarious laughter—

“Hahahahaha, this is too good!”

“Warning! Warning! Extre warning!”

“Blood pressure maxed out instantly, hahahaha!”

“Heart rate hit 135, hahahaha! I never went this nuts playing Hunt: Showdown 1v3!”

“Damn, I laughed until my stomach hurt. This ga is hilariously fun.”

“What kind of stupid ga is this? Hahaha.”

“‘Gathering Strengths’!”

“Damn, ‘Gathering Strengths’ indeed!”

Hey, I suddenly had a crazy thought—maybe Old Thief deliberately planted this smokescreen and CloudPower stole it?

“Psst—although this guess is no longer fringe and even a bit eerie, thinking carefully... it kinda makes sense.”

“Yeah, who wouldn’t say the opening screen with all these event red dots slls too strong?”

“Sounds like sothing that bastard Old Thief could pull off.”

“You’re telling ! You really shouldn’t say that!”

“Hahaha, that’s just ridiculous.”

“Laughing my ass off, how dumb do you have to be to fall for such a big scam? This ga is basically buying a pile of crap for $75.”

“Hey! Hey! Go check out the other strears in the shooter section! I call it the public restroom Spring Festival Gala!”

“Really? Hahaha...”

...

Not bad!

The heat around Apex Pri was insanely explosive!

From the United States to the Aricas, Europe, and across oceans worldwide.

Before Overwatch’s release, and even before its release date announcent, Apex Pri, with its exclusive and marketing budgets, beca the only FPS blockbuster released in the first half of the year.

And various strears had already pre-ordered and queued up for a full-on play session today!

But the result?

Whether the strears had fun was questionable.

What was undeniable was that everyone was thoroughly disgusted by this ridiculously broken ga!

All kinds of reviews flooded in.

So complained about the second-generation FPS design—

“Why does Captain Ape’s electric gun still need aiming? I don’t know, it’s just broken. By the ti that dumb gun is raised, all the enemy DPS have run ten thousand ters away, I’ve died ten thousand tis, the corpses are stiff, humans might’ve already moved out of the solar system, and your dumb gun is still aiming at nothing, just click click click. What the hell are you aiming at? Did the virtual crosshair dig up your family grave?”

So criticized the gacha system—

“Never mind the $75 price, look at this fate lucky draw setup—500 pulls guarantee, $2 per pull. Anyone who’s played knows what guarantee ans. So besides spending over $500 to get into the ga, you need another $1000 to fully unlock a hero’s experience. And then there’s that ultimate flying Doomfist priced at $200, plus the annoying Brigetta who is tanky, crowd-controlling, and damage-dealing. I just want to ask, is CloudPower going bankrupt or is Vivendi piping water for the galaxy...”

Others mocked the overly political correct ga characters and voice lines—

“Damn it, I play DPS and suddenly hear ‘My balls itch.’ What the hell? If you’re sick, go get treatnt! Why do you have to disgust people like this? And then there’s the character who’s supposedly a futa? Is this fun? Either a black angel or a ntally male Tracer, Pride Flags everywhere on the map. Why the hell doesn’t Konik wear a Pride Flag on his ugly face every day when he leaves the house? Damn! The ga is hyped so much but no wizard community shows up. Oh, licking the special groups and waving the righteous flag, disgusting the players, right...”

So players ragequit after endless losing streaks and blew their top, raging at ELO matchmaking—

“Damn it, it’s either all dumb opponents you kill like chickens with 20-0-0, or brain-dead teammates feeding the enemy with aimbot AI! If you love controlling, why don’t you go ho and control your damn dog! What’s the point of this ga? Skills don’t matter; I gotta pray to gods? Better to train with prayers than guns! Damn, if you love AI controlling win rate so much, why don’t you learn from Kora and beco a steel ball immortal? Damn...”

Players worldwide were boiling.

As that player said,

Although Apex Pri sparked a cross-boundary frenzy worldwide because of its righteous flag,

The truth was,

The ones buying and playing the ga were ordinary players, not the “wizard” leaders.

Thus,

A grand gaming holy war began!

Players everywhere shouted,

“Konik, when the hell are you coming?! I f***ing...!”

They raised their banners and marched forward!

An unprecedented PR disaster, like a collapsing skyscraper and a rising tidal wave, crashed toward Konik and his CloudPower—

Relentlessly rolling in!!!