That winter.
It was the earliest she had ever gotten up: 3:20 in the morning.
Grandma suddenly collapsed without any warning. It was also in the early hours when she got up; she fell beside the bed. The nanny who cooked breakfast for her every day found her and hurriedly called an ambulance. When they arrived at the hospital, she was still in a coma and hadn’t woken up.
Rushing from Beijing to Shanghai, Shen Jing hadn’t slept well all night. She sat on the bench outside the ICU, silent.
When the doctor erged from the ICU, he saw her still sitting there and reminded her to rest. She just humd in acknowledgnt and ultimately remained silent.
The doctor said, "We’ve done our best. Surgery is no longer an option. It’s cerebrovascular disease; it progressed from an initial narrowing to a complete blockage now."
The initial cerebrovascular disease had worsened. They had only thought it was poor mory, that she was just always confusing Liang Yingning and Xing Fei.
She really knew how to fool , Shen Jing thought. Every ti she returned to Shanghai and took her to their old restaurant, Grandma would happily put on her hat and go with her.
Even though she clearly disliked such occasions, she would still say with great enthusiasm that she wanted to go, claiming she was old and couldn’t rember what Shanghai looked like outside anymore.
Shen Jing looked up, her voice weak. "Will she wake up?"
The doctor said, "Perhaps her vital signs will fade while she’s in a coma. Prepare yourself ntally."
Shen Jing unlocked her phone and deftly dialed Zhou Luchen’s number. However, she ultimately didn’t make the call. She even laughed silently at her own actions. How could I make such a ludicrous move? Stupid, foolish. Why do I always think of that person whenever sothing happens?
She turned and walked into the ward, sitting by the bed to look at the elderly woman who refused to open her eyes to see her.
Stingy. What harm would it do to open your eyes and look at ?
Her eyes grew redder. She sniffled, trying her best to hold back her tears.
Throughout it all, it was Sun Qiyan who stayed with her.
He had brought her milk, but then, rembering she shouldn’t drink milk on an empty stomach, Sun Qiyan went downstairs again to buy her so noodles from an old alley in Dingxi.
Shen Jing had no impression of when Sun Qiyan left or when he returned, yet in that place, still reeking of disinfectant, she could sll salty oil noodles.
She sniffed.
Sun Qiyan squatted next to her. "How about we find a place to eat?"
Only then did Shen Jing realize she was so hungry she could barely stand. Sun Qiyan squatted down slightly. "It’s okay, I’ll carry you downstairs on my back."
The mont she leaned against his back, the man seed to grow so tense that his whole body stiffened. Shen Jing hastily stepped back, steadying herself against the wall, feeling nervous herself.
In her mory, aside from her father, no one had ever carried her like this.
"I’ll walk by myself."
Sun Qiyan didn’t insist.
It took them a long ti to reach the parking lot. Once they were sitting in the car, Sun Qiyan turned on all the lights. He opened the food container, prepared the chopsticks for her, and watched as she ate the noodles, one small bite at a ti.
"There’s also porridge. Let know if there’s anything else you want to eat," he said.
"What about you?" Shen Jing asked, looking at him. "Have you eaten anything?"
It seed like he had been at the hospital with her since last night.
Sun Qiyan gently rubbed her head, smiling. "I’ve eaten."
Shen Jing pushed the untouched bowl of porridge into his hands. "Eat, or we’re through."
Whether it was concern or a command, being "through" was not an option, Sun Qiyan thought.
He shook his head with a smile and did as she said.
It was very quiet; neither of them spoke.
She was sleepy but couldn’t fall asleep lying in the car. So, she returned to wait outside the ward, watching the doctors bustling into the ICU to attempt resuscitation.
Throughout the night, her grandmother was moved to the operating room.
Her eyes never closed.
It seed she wasn’t going to make it.
At two in the morning, the vital signs disappeared. Grandma never woke up to look at her one last ti. Shen Jing’s mory of her grandmother stopped at their last parting. It was the last ti she left Shanghai, when a pair of wrinkled hands had knitted her a scarf and tucked it into her luggage.
"Nannan loves to wrap up in a scarf in winter, a big one, so big her face is almost hidden. This one is light and warm too, just uglier than the ones you buy."
It wasn’t ugly.
She actually liked it a lot.
Shen Jing leaned her arms against the wall, her eyes blinking. The tears she had held in for a day and a night finally fell, dropping to the floor like pearls slipping off a string.
Sun Qiyan was montarily at a complete loss, unsure how to comfort her. In the face of life and death, words of comfort never seed to work anyway.
"Let hold you," he said.
He gently enfolded her into his embrace, and she did not refuse. The thin, soft girl curled up in his arms.
Her tears inevitably soaked his clean, white shirt.
There was no sound, only her body trembling.
Sun Qiyan raised a hand to gently stroke her back, his touch as light as a feather. He had grown fond of Grandma during their ti together; how could he not be grieving too? The old saying, "A man does not easily shed tears," didn’t seem to hold much weight now.
His chin rested on the crown of her head as he gazed, vision blurred, at the elderly woman now covered with a white sheet.
He rembered Grandma’s words:
"——Qiyan likes Nannan, he just does. Grandma can see it. Grandma likes Qiyan too; Qiyan is filial."
"——Isn’t Nannan quite the delicate one, huh?"
"——Have you ever t Nannan’s boyfriend? Is he good to Nannan?"
Never t him, don’t know him, Sun Qiyan had answered with just those six characters at the ti.
He had lied, saying her Nannan didn’t have a boyfriend.
The old lady had chuckled as she looked at him. "Then what about our Qiyan? Every ti she cos back, she always asks you to pick her up from the airport."
Even if it was every ti, what did that really an? Sun Qiyan had only smiled then and hadn’t answered the old lady.
His arms tightened, holding the crying girl in his embrace even closer.
"Don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid. You’re not alone. It’s okay, it’s okay."
"You have no idea how happy Grandma was these past few days. She told , oh, that Nannan took her to eat all the best food in Shanghai. She doesn’t rember anyone clearly, and sotis she even gets my na wrong—Yan Qiyin, Yan Qiyin..."
"Shanghai still has . If you want to co back in the future, just co to my place, okay?"
The girl in his arms remained silent, only clutching him tighter. Her tears flowed more fiercely, and she let out choked ’SOB, SOB’ sounds. His white shirt was crumpled and distorted by her grip. How deeply aggrieved she must be. If only she would say a single word.
「At the door of the hospital room.」
From the mont Sun Qiyan had gently taken Shen Jing into his arms, a man with a pair of cold, dark, profound eyes had witnessed the entire scene.
Sun Qiyan continued to console the heartbroken, sobbing young girl. She was thinly dressed and had grown even thinner. Wrapped in Sun Qiyan’s embrace, she looked like a fragile little rabbit, barely breathing.
"Ajing, you still have , right? If you want to cry, then cry. I’ll be here with you. Anyti. Don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid."
Even though Sun Qiyan’s own eyes were brimming with tears and his voice, choked with emotion, trembled painfully, he still forced himself to suppress his feelings.
Helpless, she clung to him tighter, more reliant. She must truly be so aggrieved.
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